NEW YORK (VINnews) – In an emotional profile of Kesher Nafshi founder Gedalia Miller, Mishpacha Magazine gives readers a glimpse into the lives of parents whose children struggle with religious observance.
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Seeing his own daughter choosing a lifestyle different than the one she was raised in six years ago, Miller, a Bobover chosid from Borough Park, found himself tackling challenges that he was ill-equipped to face at the time, and he and his wife sought the counsel of Williamsburg’s Krule Rebbe who emphasized the importance of maintaining non-judgmental relationships with children who may have strayed.
Over the years, Miller has been sharing the lessons he has learned with hundreds of other parents, both privately and through Kesher Nafshi, a support group for parents in similar straits. Helping parents work through their own guilt and grief, while encouraging them to understand that their children’s rebellion is almost surely a reaction to pain and trauma inflicted upon them, Miller urges parents to make peace with the unexpected direction of their lives and to shower their children with love, and acceptance as the first step in helping them heal.
A big part of our children getting turned off – is the failure of our chinuch system.
It hurts to say – but Yeshivas and BY only prefer to teach easy & perfect students and refuse to deal with problems.
I’ve seen over and over and over again.
Do those young people not have a choice on how they wish to live?
This approach his highly complex as the remaining children see bad behavior being rewarded. The OTD’s do not just choose a different life style, they choose a disruptive life style with drugs, chilul shabbos in the open, flaunting any rule in the home, late night parties etc etc. Those that give them the twisted parenting love complain that it destroyed the home.
The fruit doesn’t fall far from the tree. Although in exterior the parents may be observant, the inner soul is void of Dveykus Hashem and Yiddishkeit is a culture like all cultures. Instill the inner beauty of Yiddishkeit in the hearts of the children and they will grow to be fine, Torah observant Jews. As per Halacha, a teenager who fell through the cracks there is a mitsva to distance one’s self from such an individual, and sit shiva if he is not shomer shabbos. The system is rigged to be in favor of off the “D” youth, whilst the fault lies on the parents and educational system as well as the lifestyle of the family. Run after Olam Hazeh in your own way, and your child will learn from you to rhn after Olam Hazeh in anither way.