OP-ED – I read recently of a city in which a school set up for rejected but problem-free children was forced to close by communal influence because – according to an affected parent – it attracted families deemed unworthy of joining that community.
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Has the narrative been overstated? I don’t know. But on the face of it, it’s hard to avoid using the term “sinas chinom”.
Our society is becoming increasingly fragmented. The group of “We” becomes ever narrower, while “They” is continually expanded. And along with this comes negativity about “They”, not because they’re evil but merely because they’re different.
Fifty years ago, schools took everybody, from all streams, all backgrounds. After the Holocaust, every Yiddishe neshoma was precious. Litvish, chasidish, children of frumgeborene and of baalei tshuva mingled in school. The experience enriched and inculcated ahavas Yisroel in the students who were privileged to associate with others with different d’rachim who were equally committed to Torah.
Times have certainly changed.
Today, if parents (not their child) don’t fit the precise parameters of the school’s ideal parent image, the child will be rejected. Nobody wants the children of baalei tshuva. Nobody wants Sfardim. Nobody wants a child with even potential learning issues. Nobody wants people who differ in the minutest degree from the schools’ requirements.
Over twenty years ago, after being forced to home-school my daughter for a year and a half, I finally found one true mechanech in my own community, an educator who cared deeply about every single Yiddishe neshoma. Even though none of my other daughters had attended his school (the one they had attended rejected their little sister unhesitatingly), he took her. Even though she had special needs, he took her.
During the time my daughter was out of school, I fought for other people’s children who had also been excluded. I had no pull, no protektzia – so I badgered those who did, and who still had kind hearts, to advocate for these other children. One by one, all the excluded children at that time were placed.
Why aren’t we doing the same, now?
Where is the concern for every Yiddish neshoma?
If it was vanishingly rare twenty years ago, it seems to be virtually nonexistent today.
And it is today that Torah education in the U.S. and the U.K. is being threatened.
Is it a coincidence that, at a time when so many children in our communities are left without schools, the secular authorities have suddenly mounted an attack on Jewish education?
It surprises me that nobody has pointed out that there is a hint of “midda k’neged midda” about what’s happening.
I know that in some communities – I believe Bnei Brak was one – the rabbonim of the community united to take action. They barred the schools from opening until every child was placed.
Why isn’t this being done elsewhere? Why isn’t it being done everywhere?
And why can our rabbonim and askonim unite to defend our schools against potential threats from government intervention – but can’t come together to get our Yiddish kinderlach into the very schools they’re protecting?
A new year is almost upon us.
If we want to preserve Torah chinuch – maybe we’d better live up to it.
PLEASE NOTE – The views expressed in this article reflect the views of the author alone, and do not necessarily reflect the views of vinnews.com
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No child nowadays is worthy of a continued education. The little monkeys don’t even learn Latin or know how to change a lightbulb.
“Nobody wants Sfardim.”
Sephardic mosdot don’t want Sephardic students? Hard to believe.
Who then did they make them for? Ashkenazim??
This opinion piece uses a brush that is way too broad to paint the caricature it wants to share.
Sadly I just saw one chabad school, consumed by arrogance, throw out an entire chabad high school from its building for sinas chinam, as well.
We have completely lost our way when so called ‘educators’ are bought and paid for by wealthy individuals who are exclusive instead of inclusive.
You have made such an eloquent argument about a situation that is based on a false narrative. The writer of the article about the school closing was writing from a painful and hurt parents view but was not based on facts. There was no truth in that it was forced to close as evident by the effort to resurrect it in some form. The school closed for financial reasons only. The parent body did not support their own school. The community supported it as did some generous patrons from out of the town but even with that philanthropy they weren’t able to keep the doors open. The parents couldn’t even cover 50% of the budget. The community did it’s fair share but cannot be asked to cover it 100%.
The school was not for rejected children but rather for children of parents who rejected their parents path in yiddishkeit. The children were just sorry pawns in the game. The same parents that have been screaming that they too are frum even though they select which halachos to follow are now demanding that others support them financially. They made their bed and their position, and now they need to put their money where their mouth is.
But the writer of this article chooses to take the letter at face value and use it to create a false situation and false judgment against a community.
Until people like our satmar brother wake up to the truth there is no hope
The op writer is correct yeshivas where not rejecting children for no reason
Today it’s were does your family daven who do you know and most importantly what your grandfathers Net worth
You may argue over the individual facts of this particular case. I will not argue because I do not know the facts. However, to make believe that this issue doesn’t exist is foolish.
The writer of this article specifically points out situations in which he or she was involved with.
I myself have heard directly from a father who was trying to get his child into a school and without any shame the scholl told him that his child will be accepted on condition that he gives a very large donation. And that was on top of the tuition. He reached out to plenty of so called askanim and was told that he didn’t fit their criteria. He ended up borrowing the money because he had no other choice.
And I’ve heard of others in similar situations.
You can make believe that it doesn’t exist. But it does.
Do sephardic schools in brooklyn like ateret torah or magen david or ahi ezer take ashkenazim? NO!
It’s a problem that’s getting solved in Brooklyn but not in Monsey or Lakewood. Brooklyn yeshivas have more room these days because many people moved. Some yeshivas lost twenty to thirty per cent of their students. It’s mostly the litvish yeshivas but some chassidic ones too.
Gut gezugt! Thank you, and to all, who bring much needed attention to this “machla”. Where are the true Jewish leaders, like those of yesteryear, who will “do uncomfortable” to really serve the Jewish People? Time for all the BS’rs to either “walk the walk”, or be exposed. Genug shoin, already!
One of our kids had behavior issues. We found out many years later that he was preyed on by a teacher who is now on “the wall”. We were ready to do anything our son’s school recommended to fix the problem, but the school was determined to get rid of him. Now he is intermarried.
In addition to what the article says, it’s also the horrific tuition fees that are damaging erlicher families, and forcing some to send their kids to public schools out of town. Others, who just want to pay their average bills, are forced to have small families.
RealSatmar is correct in that this OpEd is based an an article which was full of fabrications. Based on this OpEd (if the author is genuine), the difference between this author is that he/she were willing to give up something for their children while most (not all, but most) of the parent body of the school that closed down cared more about themselves than their precious innocent children (it’s beyond the scope of this comment section to explain, but most probably get it).
In Lakewood, there simply is not enough girl schools. Every girls school gets way more applications than they have room for. So of course they have the right to accept whomever they want for those “x” slots.
I grew up in an out of town community where everyone basically went to one school. I live in Lakewood now and completely get it. The only solution is more schools.
My kids were rejected from every yeshivah so we enrolled them in public school. They are thriving, have friends from all different cultures and are actually learning uncensored science. Best decision we ever made.
I met an individual from the Agudah this weekend who is working on this issue. I shared my opinion which is very much in line with this Op-ed. Close all the schools down! They are private fiefdoms and have hurt too many. A Jewish education is not only for metzuyonim and the well connected. A Jewish education is for everyone. It’s about ensuring that there is another generation in Klal Yisrael. Close them all down!
i passed by a bus stop today with my 23 year old daughter at the stop was a young mother in jeans. my daughter said that girl was thrown out of high school in 9th grade, with malkie klein AH for having a cell phone. i couldnt
help but cry for what has happened to us
Avraham Fried was unfortunately wrong when he sang “NO JEW WILL BE LEFT BEHIND”.