New York – A lot of men and women have been turning up in my office lately because they haven’t been able to lose weight through diets or exercise. Some are only 10 pounds overweight, whereas others are overweight by 30 pounds or more. The diets have plenty of recipes and the gyms have plenty of equipment — but those resources still haven’t been enough.
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Diets and gyms require motivation and commitment. And I’m talking to more and more patients who are deeply ambivalent about giving up food. Eating has become one of their primary sources of pleasure; for all intents and purposes, they’re as addicted to food as other people are to smoking or
alcohol.
You might be surprised to learn that eating has a lot in common with smoking and other dependencies. It occupies people, focusing them on a repetitive hand-to-mouth activity. It provides stress relief. Going on a cigarette break or making a pit stop at a doughnut shop are both escapes from the frenzy of life.
Food, like tobacco and alcohol, also contains substances that are mind-altering. Fats can stabilize mood; carbs can increase energy. And many nutrients are linked to levels of serotonin and other brain chemical messengers that basically determine whether we feel content and happy — or anxious and depressed.
I’ve come up with a three-prong strategy for my patients. It acknowledges that food is much more of a drug than we have understood it to be. You can’t be sober from food, but you do have to eat
responsibly.
* Find Out If You’re Depressed
I believe a large percentage of those who are battling being overweight are actually depressed. They report low mood or irritability, accompanied by other symptoms of depression, such as impaired sleep and low self-esteem. Overcoming depression/overeating often requires medication.
* Figure Out Why You Overeat
That’s right — why. Eating too much food is a shield people use to avoid unresolved emotions from the past. If you’ve tried dieting and haven’t gotten into shape, get into therapy. It’s a mind gym.
* Break the Stimulus-Reward Cycle
If you eat to escape, stop the stimulus-
reward cycle. Allow yourself only a certain amount of time to eat and never read or watch television or do anything else enjoyable at the same time. No “seconds,” ever.
Here’s the bottom line: Being overweight is most often a symptom of an underlying problem, not the entirety of the problem. You’ve got to get at its roots to rid yourself of it.
Keith Ablow, MD, is a psychiatrist, Fox News Chan nel contributor and founder of livingthetruth.com. Contact him at [email protected].
I disagree with this article. While some people who are overweight might overeat and really have a food food addiction, many others have undiagnosed medical problems causing their obesity. In my case it was mercury toxicity from mercury dental fillings.
“Being overweight is most often a symptom of an underlying problem”
Mentioning this, then mentioning depression as the cause does not make sense to me. Imo depression is often a symptom of an underlying medical problem, and when the medical problem is treated, the depression disappears.
I’m addicted to food. I’ve eaten food virtually every day of my life. I feel so hopeless.
Are you an M.D.? The author of the article is. If you want to disagree with him you need to have, at least, the same qualifications.
he is correct. Check out groups like OA or soveya – when you take care of the underlying chaos, there is less of a need to self medicate/overeat. Tzama nafshi leiLokim – I fill myself with Hashem and his knowdledge on Him, rather than fill myself up with food.
“You might be surprised to learn that eating has a lot in common with smoking and other dependencies. It occupies people, focusing them on a repetitive hand-to-mouth activity. It provides stress relief. Going on a cigarette break or making a pit stop at a doughnut shop are both escapes from the frenzy of life.”
And this is bad because…? Why would you think anyone would be supprised? The comfort factor of eating (noshing) is common knowledge.
This is an example of a responsible article about a medical topic that appears in the lay press. It entertains a spectrum of causes, does not diagnose the reader, and speaks to the effectiveness of treating the entire problem. The reality is that obesity is a symptom. So is fever. Treating a fever may result in additional comfort or relief, but does cure the illness that causes. And a symptom untreated can sometimes result in worse problems. This helps explain why diets have such poor success. They address the food choices, much less eating habits, and even less lifestyle factors. And attention to habits, emotional states, and physical activity are conspicuously absent. Re-read this article a few times. It is loaded with useful information.
This article is right on the money. The problem is not so much between the plate and one’s mouth, but between one’s two ears. And also remember, being addicted to a bodily pleasure is not consistent with a Torah lifestyle. If you don’t want to take my word for it, read the Sefer HaChinuch on the mitzva of Lo Sasuru. It will open your eyes.
I learn and daven in a really Heimish shul in the morning. Most mornings there is a reason for someone to give “tikkun”. This is not just some sponge cake and a bottle of shnapps,most mornings it’s a serious spread.There is a coupe of cake platters (seven layer,chochlate roll..etc., )herring in cream sauce ,crackers, rugalech in a couple of flavors. The shul is mostly fifty year old people plus. (I am younger and not as heimish as the congregation) I am horrified by what is going on there. i wish I can do something about the overeating by obese middle aged people . I understand that to many “unzerer” food is one of the only Kosher outlets and there is socializing in the morning,over this spread, but this is still a serious health problem..
just looking at the picture, i had to run out to get some
I have like around 20 pounds everweight, I am a very happy guy!
I have may problems like anyone in golus, but no depression at all ,aderaba
these doctors, today they say one thing, tomorrow they say the opposite
#17 – Where is your shul? I am going to go to your minyan starting tomorrow morning !!! Herring and bagels and cake every morning !!! Olam Habah !!! Now let me go to lunch…
As I heard an interview on Juan Hanity they said the famous quote
I walked into a heath food store and saw many weak people,
I walked into burger king that we were all the healthy looking people,
Have a Great day
It is important for parents of young children to teach them a very simple concept: “Portion contol”. BUT, it can only really be taught by example. I personally struggled with this, the first two weeks of eating normally I would literally cry to myself because I felt so deprived. But then it payed off. Today I can’t even eat like I used to even if I wanted to. But I always need to remember how easy it is to stretch my stomach again, so I pay attention to stop when I feel full. My husband said to me “Some people put a “band” on their stomachs, you put a band on your brain.”. I am on none of these yidishe OA programs, I eat ONE (big) slice of regular challah by the Shabbos/Yom Tov meals and I have a decent SINGLE portion of cake Shabbos/Yom Tov, and live a regular life- not one extreme and not the other. If ever (rarely) I still don’t feel satisfied after a normal portion of food, I WILL eat more. But SOMETHING ELSE- NEVER a second portion of the same food, even on Shabbos/Yom Tov. If after that extra food I am still not satisfied, I know that this is my old habit trying me and I will not have anything else after that. Just diet soda.
it’s foolish to denie that obesity and lack of exercise is a serious problem in the frum community.i personally recommend weight watchers-teaches you how to eat right for life(you think you don’t eat that much but you’ll see,you do)and the meetings offer lots of support and understanding of emotional eating.
A frum lifestyle simply leaves little time for exercise. I learn and daven at 6:00 a.m. in the morning, rush off to the office and often don’t get home until 8:00 p.m. I eat supper help the kids with homework and tests (especially the girls who are overloaded with work). I learn a little more and then —– I’ve had it. I am emotionally and physically exhausted. I simply can’t get myself out to a gym at 10:30 p.m.
Shabbos and Yom Tovim obviously don’t afford the opportunity to exercise.
The non Jew and irreligious people I know spend the morning in the gym, while I’m in shul or at night, while I’m doing homework and have an additional seder.
In a more perfect world, I woul get out of work at 5, be home at 6 and have more time. But the extraordinary expenses we have in tuitions and etc. force us to work hard long hours. It is a viscious cycle and I do not know how to resolve it. And don’t tell me don’t learn! I’m entitled to learn an hour in the morning and an hour at night. I don’t think that’s overdoing it.
It was good to see in print that compulsive overeating is an addiction, just like drug addiction and alcoholism. What is not written in the article however, is this – if overeating is an addiction, then it needs a solution that maps onto addiction – and that solution has to be 4 pronged – physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. Addiction is a spiritual disease in which the addict communicates his or her overarching need for Hashem, but does so in an abberent fashion – through something of the earth. It is a desire for ruchnias transmutted into a craving for something gashmei. The emptiness of the addict is as infinite as Hashem’s fullness is infinite. And the despair of the addict is as deep as the simcha one experiences through deveikus Hashem.
So, a quick thought about recovery –
Physical – there is a need for a food plan – a plan of eating for life, one day at a time – not a diet that we do for a short time and then return to our eating compulsively.
Mental – there is a need for a change in attitude towards food and towards life. This can be accomplished by a careful and honest daily inventory of the challenges we face in the realm of middos and then making amends and restitutions for the wrongs we have done.
Emotional – there is a need – a deep need – to know we are not alone, that what I feel on the inside – which I compare to my detriment to the outside’s of others – is really the same as what goes on inside others. This is where I join the human race.
Spiritual – there is a need for G-d, and for access to the spiritual principles by which G-d wishes us to live. To achieve this I must surrender my right to eat compulsively and then choose to “walk humbly with my G-d.”
This is the recovery program b’kitzer. Food addiction is an addiction. If it is a problem for you, don’t let anyone say you are weak willed or that you surely can eat just one of these sugary things. Get serious about recovery and put down the food, for G-d’s blessing is waiting for you. Don’t miss out on the blessing.
Skinny chussid said,
I’m a fairly young guy. And I live in a very Ultra-Orthodox neighborhood, I get sick when I see people my age that are 30 to 40 pounds over wait.
It starts with the Yeshives/school who feed there students poor nutrition, and not only that they never think of giving an Education on the subject, like what’s Protein,Fiber, how much is the basic Calories for a normal healthy diet.
The normal diet for an average frum person contains of Chulent w/Kishka starting from Wednesday night and on, and the ideal Breakfast is the “tikkun” in the morning shull, cake, shnopps,etc.
And who said anything about exercise Nu! That’s Momesh Trief.
And the other point I want to mention here, why when U pick up any Yiddish news paper it doesn’t have any articles regarding health, and if some of them do mention something, its a small piece on the back page and they make it sound irrelevant.
“Nishmortem meod lenofshosiechem” that’s an Halacha to take care of your health. It is just as part of Yiddishkiet than any other Mitzva in the Torah.
Stay fit and healthy and don’t make fouls choices, then you’ll be an amazing jew.