Israel – When Ruth asked to sign up for an Orthodox high school in her home town in the North, she was refused.
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The official reason is because of immodest behavior by her mother – which Ruth rejected out of hand.
In a letter written by the principal of the school, the principal revealed a list of conditions for accepting Ruth "on probation" to the Orthodox girls high school, the conditions being that her mother keep to the requirements listed in the letter.
In the letter, the principal details five general rules for Ruth's mother: "Completely covering her hair; shirts – not tight or with printed phrases, closed at the neck and covering the elbows; skirts – not tight, without slits, and jeans material is not allowed; socks are required and must cover all the exposed leg; and all fashion accessories must be modest and not stand out too much."
The conclusion of the letter included a statement that "If the expected progress does not happen, the student will not have a place in our school.
According to the principal, the list of conditions was accepted by the extended family. [haaretz]
lubavitch in russian
To anonymous 2:54 PM: Lubavitch means “city of Brotherly Love”.
———————————
In which language? Chinese?
Totally absurd!!! what does the child’s education have anything to do with her grandmother? Instead of rejecting Ruth they should praise her for improving herself from what she was brought up with!!
In the US even private schools have to comply with anti-discrimination rules. For instance, they can’t keep out, say Canadians, solely based on their national origin. I would think in the US the school would lose as they would be sued for discrimination based on national origin (that’s how the EEOC or the lawyers would position it).
To anonymous 2:54 PM: Lubavitch means “city of Brotherly Love”.
Does anyone know the story about the Chofetz Chaim being upset with a melamed for kicking a boy out of cheder?
TO THE MOTHER WHO’S DAUGHTER GOES TO BENOUS MENCHEAM IN CROWN HEIGHTS! A LUBAVITCHER MEAN’S WHAT?
TRIMMED BEARD, NEVER LEARNING CHITAS, NO KAPOTA OR TIE? YOU WANT YOUR CHILDREN TO BE CHASSIDIM OR MISNAGNIM? MOVE TO FLATBUSH THEN! YOU HAVE THE CHUZSPAHA TO EXPLECT THE SCHOOL TO CHANGE THE WAY LUBAVITCH HAS BEEN FOR OVER 300 YEARS BECAUSE YOUR HUSBAND DOES OR DOESN’T HAVE A BEARD! BUT ATLEAST THE “GAZZAR IN LUBAVITCH” ARE TAKING A SIDE! A GUT MOEAD
Schools are more concerned about their image to others than about drawing people near to Torah. Parents may not want their children exposed to people who do not dress tznius but they should teach the students to be students of Aharon.
Schools are frustrated at trying to get people to dress tznius so they try to force it on them but the schools must realize that this has to come from an inner will to love Hashem and do His will.
Old News. My daughter’s school in Crown Heights, Bnos Menachem, has adopted these rules for this school year. Rumor has it they for next year they’ll require all fathers to have full beards…..
Nuts
I can understand schools having rules . However, there are some schools that are totally unreasonable. I suggest everyone read the book “Unchosen” see what happens to our children based on treatments like this.
Perhaps had the school taken a different approach, and ‘worked’ with the mother – allowed the gorl in the school and then slowly the mother could have been infulenced by the child.
But no the yeshiva stood on it’s high hoarse, and said you do not do it my way – good bye. Is this anyway to do Kiruv, no, Is this anyway to change someone no, have we forgotten basic manners. If the school would have taken in the child, the child would come home, and make the mother change. So what does the Yeshiva do throw the baby out with the bath water – It is a chillul hashem what the school did.
Anon. 9:43AM You must have gone through a very painful experience (while attempting to register your child). The world does not turn on
“Fedoras Vs. Sockhats [in freezing weather]”. The bottom line is, we have to use common sense, at all times. (and not mix up our priorities, or what’s important Vs.
what’s trivial).
Anon. 8:46AM The point of your post
is well taken, even though it departs from the episode in the original news article. However, the analogy between the beginning of the Chasidic movement (vs. the Misnagdim) and LEHAVDIL, the cause for the development of the Reform movement is incorrect.
Very Simple.
A private school has the right to make their own rules who to accept who not.
If the women cannot obey to the rules of the school, then she has to “understand” her daughter cannot be accepted, its not that they dont want to accept her daughter they DO, but thats the rule and if to dress not tzineusdig is more important then your daughter education…. then something is wrong.
As far as schools / yeshivas rejecting kids because either their parents dont have enough money to cover tuition or any other reason, look I was rejected from 2 yeshivas not because I wasnt a good student, only because of a administrators decision…. while I wish them all the best and good luck, today 15 years later BOTH of those yeshivas are half way closed and they both fell from 2-300 bochurim to 10-20 so today I look back hmmmmm what comes around goes around.
Hey, geniuses!! this is a high school girl. She probably wanted this, not her parents!! and Mark this is going on all over the place. Edumacators think this is the way to convince youngsters how to live the proper way. Talk to any Kiruv expert, they’ll tell you this ain’t it.
I don’t understand – isn’t this a private school? If so they have the “right” to make any laws that they want. If a job ad said you must work 7 days a week and you take the job and then scream anti-semits?
But then again this story could be fiction (almost).
no school has a right to act like the freaking taliban. you think this is what they did in yeshivas sheim veiver? this is what they do in iran not in israel. sick people.
the same thing happens in brooklyn it is purely vile. “his grandmother had a little television set, lets not let this boy in the yeshiva”
sick demented people. then they dont even teach basic middos, just how to wear fedoras in the freezing cold instead of sockhats.
I dont understand something. If a school is federally funded or funded with taxpayers money then how can the school be so harsh by thier OWN rediculous rules?
The fact that the article (A) appeared in Ha’aretz; and (B) the original article uses the term “ultra-Orthodox” not once, but seven times, indicates that there is more than a little bit of a slant on the article, and an agenda.
Is it a Shuvu school? We cannot tell from reading the article, but if it is, then this would give lie to all of Shuvu’s shnor propaganda (and cause an unpleasant reaction from this Shuvu supporter).
How immodest does the mother dress? Does she adequately cover the swastika tattoos on her breasts? If not, then maybe even a Shuvu school would be justified in imposing such a condition.
And maybe, just maybe, the school really does have an agenda to discriminate against Sefardim.
All of the foregoing are mere speculation. One cannot tell from merely reading the article.
The only thing that is certain is that the article is not telling the whole story, and that what is and is not being disclosed is based upon some sort of agenda of the author and the publisher.
A school in my neighborhood sends post-cards to mothers who they deem not dressed properly. When my wife and I went for an interview, the checked out my wife to see she was dressed Tznius. We decided not to send our child to that school. Don’t like the jewish Talibans.
I believe that the frum community has entered a dangerous period where extreme views based on mostly superficial criteria have taken over in place of heart-felt Jewish dedication and feeling. This will result in the pendulum swinging sharply in the other direction…I would say within ten to twenty years there will be a rebellion in the frum world…it has happened before leading to such things as the Baal Shem Tov on one hand and Reform and other apikorsus on the other. It will happen again because the present harshness will lead to resentment as it already does in many homes.
Don’t give me the line that we are not living in Iran. We are there already. I wanted a son to attend a certain cheder but he was rejected as my husband did not learn full time. Another son went to a prominent yeshiva for a farher and was rejected as during the interview the Rov said something about “there” customs in December and my son went on to give a complete explanation of them based on the Gemara which explains some of the basis on them on Greek mythology. He was also rejected as they did not want any of the students knowing all this and aunderstanding the detail. My husband was outraged as to how his son could be rejected for knowing gemara! They felt that a 12 year old must not be focused correctly to know all about the other culture.
HAARETZ RAN THE ARTICLE & TWISTED THE STORY W/O LYING
A FEW POINTS
1. B”H THE GIRL WANTED VERY MUCH TO GO TO A MIDDLE ROAD FRUM HIGH SCHOOL (HER FAMILY IS NOT QUITE THERE YET
2.RATHER THAN REJECT HER THEY DRAFTED A OUTLINE THAT WOULD SATISFY THE “SCHOOL POLICY” PART WAY & WOULDNT BE OVERBEARING ON THE PARENTS (PRIVATE ISSUES TV..MUSIC… WERE LOOKED AWAY….
3. AND HASHEM IS VERY PROUD OF THE MOTHER FOR TAKING THE BOLD STEP AND ADAPTING NEW STANDARDS FOR HER DAUGHTERS SAKE “VEHAISHIV LEV BONIM AL AVOSAM”
HATZLACH UBRACHA
and what about the hypocrits that walk the walk and talk the talk, and still have a lot of stuff in the closets??? u know what i mean…
What’s the big deal? These are the basic laws of tznius. If someone does not want to adhere to these rules, there must be many other schools with a laxer attitude where the child and mother would fit in.
Anon: 12:03 AM
This is not Iran. There is freedom to send the child to this school while following the schools rules and sending her to any other school if they do not want to follow these rules. In Iran, or other countries, there would be no choice; you either follow their rules or you get beheaded or some other extreme punishment!
therapydoc
If this is the type of therapy you do, I can only hope you don’t “help” orthodox Jews become less frum. There have been many millions of frum Jews throughout the ages who followed the laws of tznius their whole lives without any problems whatsoever B”H. If a person is comfortable with themselves and their way of life, there is no need for a mid life crisis or running out for fancy gadgets etc. etc. That only happens when there are other more serious underlying problems. Nobody is forcing this child into this school with these rules. It is a choice they are free to make. If they want this school, these are the rules they must follow. If they can’t, there are other schools more on their level where they can be more comfortable.
dont look now but there are a number of schools on this side of the pond that do the same exact thing.
While it is certainly reasonable for the school to assume and uphold its standards, what would lead a family to subject themselves to such disdain and distaste for their life choices?
There are plenty of genuinely and deeply frum communities that wouldn’t think twice about modes of dress others would consider immodest.
Why raise a family to feel as if they are deviants when they can grow up feeling normal and valued by their religious community? To do otherwise is so emotionally and spiritually damaging.
Excuse me….Every frum school has a right to set rules and regulations for that school. If the parents have an issue with their rules they have a choice and do not have to send their children to that particular school. For example, if I cover my hair and do not have Tv in my house, I expect the school that I send my children to to abide by those rules. So I will seek out a particular school that shares my veiws. There is nothing wrong with that!
this is the rules of this school no one is forcing you to send to this school however if you want to send to this school then you need to follow the rules
and this is the same in other schools
Will families like these need therapy eventually? Isn’t it likely someone’s going to buy a sports car or feel a need for a divorce mid-life?
is this israel or iran???