New York – Our community idolizes people with money. Their names are on our buildings; they get the most aliyas in shul; they are feted at large communal banquets. Our kids are watching. They see that rabbis, social workers and teachers struggling to get by while Wall Street traders have their names in bright lights.
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It took Gavi and Rivka Holtzberg being murdered by terrorists in Mumbai for Chabad emissaries to finally get the recognition they deserve as heroes of the Jewish people. The same is true of Israeli soldiers, who seem to come back into the American Jewish consciousness only when Israel is at war with Hamas in Gaza. The rest of the time we go back to what truly matters – that our kids get into Harvard.
IF WE have learned one thing from the Bernard Madoff scandal, it’s that the Jewish community is in need of new heroes. No longer can we look up only to those who are billionaires, even if they are significant philanthropists. If we continue to highlight money men as Jewish role models, then we create the conditions for more Jews to cut corners to make a buck at any cost so that they receive the recognition of their peers.
Our community must stand first and foremost for godly values. Everything else is secondary.
From the age of 16 I wanted to be a rabbi, and shortly after my 22nd birthday, I had the honor of becoming the Rebbe’s emissary at Oxford University. My wife and I worked our guts out to build Jewish life at the university, which meant spending about half my time fund-raising, about the norm for the average Chabad emissary. After a few years, my students graduated and went on to lucrative careers. They had none of the money problems I did. Some of them may have worked a quarter as hard but got paid 10 times as much, especially if they went to work on Wall Street.
IT DIDN’T seem fair. As Chabad emissaries, where was our security? I watched many of my rabbinic colleagues borrowing money just to psy for their childrens’ weddings, and this after a lifetime of hard work. Where was the justice?
But what sustained me in communal work was the fact that in Chabad the models at the top of the communal ladder were not the money men but the shluchim. To be an emissary of the Rebbe is seen as life’s highest honor (although even in Chabad these days the money men are beginning to assume a preeminence that they didn’t enjoy before).
We see the same model in the settler movement in Israel. The heroes are those who sacrifice by living in dangerous areas where they face incessant terror attack. Yes, settler yeshivot and institutions are assisted by millionaire philanthropists, but it is still the settlers themselves who are the role models of the movement. This is why both Chabad and the settler groups continue to attract strong pools of talent rather than losing their most gifted souls to technology startups or making yerida to make more money in America. It all comes down to whom you hold up as heroes.
LOOK, I’M not naïve. I understand that money makes the world go round. Without cash, the shuls can’t open, the schools would close and Jews would be returned to the impoverished life we suffered for centuries.
But there has to be a balance. Surely we can elevate those who work for the communal good for little financial reward to positions of glory in our community so our children get the message that righteousness rather than wealth is what Jews most respect. Can anyone reading this article name five famous contemporary Jewish thinkers? Can you name any lawyers celebrated for defending Israel other than Alan Dershowitz? Can you name 10 famous Jewish educators?
When the Lubavitcher Rebbe died, I wrote an article about his life on the plane back from his funeral. I called it “The colossus and me” and began by mentioning that what I first noticed about the Rebbe were the holes in his shoes. Here was a man utterly divorced from materialism, even though he was one of the most influential Jews of the 20th century. The same would be said of people like the Dalai Lama. Wouldn’t you be surprised if you heard that the robe he was wearing was Dolce and Gabbana? The fact is, saintly individuals don’t care much for things. Those who do are possessed of an inner emptiness. They stuff every Rolex watch and Chanel suit into the black hole of their existence in the hope of filling up the chasm in their lives. But since these things are ultimately valueless, it can only create a shopaholic addiction that is neither satisfying nor fulfilling.
WHAT I am saying is that our community’s obsession with material wealth bespeaks a spiritual crisis that can only be resolved by returning to our core spiritual commitments of family, community and tradition. We need to attend more classes and fewer shopping malls. We need to tell our kids that it’s more important to us that they act righteously than succeed professionally. And we need to recommit ourselves to our families, putting the bedroom before the boardroom and the family dining table before the office desk.
After the Holocaust, many in the Jewish community concluded that money is the best guarantor of continuity and security. If we were wealthy, we could lobby for Israel and build vital communal institutions that would lead to a rebirth.
This notion was only partially correct, because without emphasizing to our children that the Jewish people standfor tradition, ethics and a holy way of life, we stood the risk of being corrupted by wealth and coming to see money as the end rather than the means.
Once you remove morality from the picture, everything is lost. Once we produce billionaires without values, there is no telling where their greed will stop. So you can wake up one morning and discover that everything you lived for – membership in the most expensive country club, access to the most exclusive investment vehicle – has vanished in a puff of hot air. Both figuratively and literally.
but what about all the tyere Asscans?
“We see the same model in the settler movement in Israel. The heroes are those who sacrifice by living in dangerous areas where they face incessant terror attack.”
You call them heroes, i call them shmucks.
Why do we listen to Boteach – this was the same man who ran after Michael Jackson?
What else is new? Haven’t we known this all along? Now go change the world.
You know the answer they use? Rebbe machabed ha-ashirim.
Shmuley:
Git gezugt!
I think I’m going to adopt Reb Shmully as my rebbi muvhak.
No Rebbe, Rosh Yeshiva, or Rov says what he’s saying.
Amen to that
I could not agree with this article more. As a BT I left the material world of secular, American reform Judaism in search of something more spiritual and meaningful religiously. Imagine my surprise and shock coming into the frum world of New York… $3000 custom sheitels, pesach vacations, mansions on ocean parkway, Lexus SUV’s, $10,000 chassan watches, etc, etc… It’s a disgrace the way the community is living and I am glad that someone is finally writing about what we are all thinking… We must scale back the gashmius before it destroys us!!
Shmuely,
I read your article, as I usually read everything (well, excluding a couple of your books that I just did not have the funds for) you write.
I agree with the main idea however I do have a couple of comments to make:
1. I have a major-big-whopping-enormous problem with your comparison of the dalai lama to the Rebbe, yes I do understand the point you were trying to make, No I still do not think you should write the name of such Tumah in close capacity to the holy name of the Rebbe, no, not even for Goyim or Not-yet-religious understanding!!
2. You write that money is not all – if so, can you explain why, a few years ago, while I was reeling from the affects of personal tragedies and circumstances in my life and I turned to you – the only way I knew how, through your website and was answered that I can receive your advice, via email for the dear price of $100?
May you continue to use the talent Hashem gave you for positive things and may we be Zoche to celebrate Simchos in the Beis Hamikdash, starting Now!!
once again an article by boteach where its all about him
i completely agree to a point, however the gemara does state that one who is wealthier in gashmeyus should have the finer things in life which should as well be to a limit defintiely agree but people should not take this article to mean that those who have money BH should start living in poverty, just that they should be aware of where we come from and who we are as a nation. More Teshuva, Tefila, and Tzedaka that will bring the Geula Shleima… Umein!
Rabbi Botech : all due respect can you please explain to me the Mishne: “Rebbe mechabid Ashirim: Rebbe (reb meir) honored the rich ” Why didnt rebbe mechabed the learning gedoylim.? Why didnt rebbe mechabed the kolel yingeleit.?
Rebbe thought us that we have to be mechabed the rich because Charity is the IKKER when it comes to yisihkeit..When someone gives away from his Money for others (poor,sick,or others).and other people see how he is being given the kuved he will copy and do the same and give away from his for others.
but what about all the “askonim” we worship???
It’s a shame that he’s the only one that says this. A really big shame.
I know what everyone’s going to say, “Agudah tried to tone down chasunas years ago and no one listened,” blah blah blah. No one listened because they themselves weren’t serious about it and didn’t endorse or enforce it, and neither did anyone else.
A few years ago a certain leader spoke out against materialism and a year ago (maybe even less) he held a parlor meeting in one of the most ostentatious homes in Lakewood. How is any thinking person supposed to respect him or his views after that, especially his message of a few years before regarding materialism?
The author means well and his point is almost made. Unfortunately, he seems to be upset with all rich people, including the ones who are G-d fearing. He makes no mention of the people who give the funds for the shlichim to do their work. The ones that get 50% of the reward. He also doesn’t want to realize that rich people can get a lot more kovod giving money to secular items than to organizations where the author is associated. All of klal yisroel are heroes and we can learn from each one. I never thought the author would turn into a right-wing fanatic that goes on torah, torah, torah and that the rest of the world is garbage. I thought that was reserved for the right-wing idiots that are all scrambling to get $ now. I have much more to say, but it is not about this article and is not nice – so I resist.
This guy is really something. He is the one who is enomored with wealth and popularity.
i wouldnt compare universally the rebbe with the dalai lama after we are jews and as a cohesive unit we have our own set of heroes and we dont compare them with others we dont assimilate we have our torah and our own set of values and people who represent those values noone cares abt the dalai lama why do u have to feel that to be legitimate u have to put the rebbe and the dalai lama together shame on u ASSIMilating and graying all our specific virtues
Shmuli,
Madoff’s name was not on a single Torah institution that I know of.
In true yahadus we find the partnership of Yisachar and Zevulun. I hope that those who are tomech Torah continue to have that ability and have their holy names on the buildings they erect.
Can I name 10 great educators?! Are you kidding me?! In Torah circles there are hundreds of mechanchim who are moser nefesh for the future of klal yisroel day in and day out. I can name 50 off the top of my head.
The real problem is that shmuli boteach hangs around michael jackson and other mushchasim and when they leave him and the economy stinks he has to lecture us on who WE should idolize.
Do Rav Matisyahu Solomon Rav Avraham Shor and Rav Efraim Wachsman pass as great thinkers?! How about Rav Dishon Rav Akiva Tatz and Rav Moshe Weinberger? How about Rav Avigdor Miller ZT”L Rav Tauber and rav Brevda?
How about Rav Noach Weinberg and Rav Zelig Pliskin?
Do I have to go on? A thinker inspires shmuli and they do and you don’t.
Shmuley,
Brilliant and apt once again. Keep it up! Halevay someone will listen and something will change!
Things have gotten out of hand. The middah of a frum Jew should be mistapkin bemuat – being satisfed with a little.
But today, little is equated with being outdated, cheap, unsuccessful, unsophisticated, not balabatish. We neede a new perception of life, or perhaps, reverting to the perception that existed before all this conspicuous consumption.
I think that Boteach should practice what he preaches.
If sombody has the money he can do whatever he feels like within the law it is nobody elses concern, people should mind to thier own business instead of looking at what other people have or do, If you do not like what you see a rich person doing with thier money too bad!
good timing.. why not cling to religion now? no wealthy people anyway – as soon as the market turns back up and there are lots of wealthy people giving out money, we will be sucking up the same way. all of us.
Something you will never hear from a rosh yeshiva today!
Article is good but you guys are focussing on the negative points he made about being ostentacious and rich. Focus on the positive. Whom should our kids hold up as heros? Paying yeshiva tuition and putting away for chasunas is heroic too.
someone that needs to drive a lexus imstead of a fully loaded honda toyota etc is plain and simple insecure.
Beautiful article Shmuly.Just one question: how to you expect ppl to listen to you when just this week you appeared on CNN with this lowlife Shwartza who calls himself LD?! and you seemed to be having a grand time in his company in front of a mixed crowd of Shkotzim.I love your point but you gotta live up to who you are.
I got news for you… if you see the rebbes, they have the biggest menorahs, fur pelt coats, the fancy esrog not to mention their succahs and homes…and you wonder why some of the chassidim dress accordingly…expensive shtreimels and bekechas, etc., etc….And the way the women dress, they all look like they are going to weddings when they are just going to the grocery store….
Rebbi mechabed ashurim, whats wrong with being mechabed someone who give charity?
You are a fool for failing to see the heroism in parting with millions. Its problem that is widespread and comes from jealousy.
While you may have some points that are undeniable in your article you have missed the main point.
Wealthy people are heros in the sense that there are countless mosdos that function on their generosity and in current times are suffering along with our gevirim. In these times more than ever people, especially our geverim, should realize that hashem gives and takes and what you keep in your bank account does do you good its what you give out. Geverim have a responsibility to keep under the radar and not live flamboyant lifestyles publicly, that are beyond the communities reach. Its the way they live that cause people to idolize them NOT having their name on a building.
Lastly in our hard times its easy to see that the work of shluchim and marbitzei torah are the main thing and worldly occurrences such as death or great financial loss can change their standing.
So rather than exploit rich people to sensationalize your writings (which isn’t the most drastic thing you have done for self promotion)(playboy) you should laud the marbitzai torah and pray that hakodosh boruch hu gives much needed hatzlacha to our geverim so they can ‘bail-out’ our mosdos and tzedakas that are truly in need.
Jake
boteach doesnt want us to idolise people with money..hes missed the point we are NOT allowed to idolise anyone/anything.Maybe he means look up to, but either way i wont be looking up to him for spiritual guidance
I don’t know… he looks to well kept and happy to be critizing the well-heeled and rich…
people with real problems just don’t have that happy -life is a cabart look… maybe I am wrong, but that’s what he looks like to me.. so he shouldn’t be critizing the affluent… maybe point out the ones who give hugh sums to uphold Torah and the people who live with a life of Torah… anyway, someone who wrote a book on very very intimate relationships (a few years ago) is not on my best seller of being a “mashgiach” for anyone…
Dearest Friend!
The following is not against the wealthy kindhearted humble righteous people.
I hope Hashem doesn’t give you their (less fortunate) nisayon.
It’s easy to condemn highly educated hard working people holding two jobs and still struggling to make ends meet. Most of them are people who are trying to find fulfillment and happiness in the blessings they have rather than focusing on what they weren’t fortunate enough to acquire. Not to mention the constant humiliation as a result.
Please consider if the situation would be in the reverse, how it would feel.
It simply boils down to being truly fair and feeling for the plight of others. It’s tragically painful for any father to see two of his children who are equally putting in 100% effort, one being successful and the other one not. Let alone seeing that the wealthy son only gives 10% – 20% of his fortune, while he’s perfectly aware that it’s no where enough to save the day.
(The Halacha of not giving more than 20% of your income was meant only for the average working class, certainly not for the millionaires let alone billionaires.)
The most painful underlining point of the story with Yoseph and his brothers is that (Bereishis / Genesis 42-21) “indeed we are guilty concerning our brother inasmuch as we saw his heartfelt anguish when he pleaded with us and we paid no heed; that is why this anguish has come upon us.” From a father’s perspective there’s nothing more painful and unfair.
I wish you will always enjoy being on the giving end!
With much respect,
Sara
I work in a yeshivah and I think we may have missed the boat on this one. When 17 year old kids drive to school in a $70,000 import sports car from their $4,000,000 home, wearing over $1000 in clothing that they may never wear again, with over $1000 in their wallets, i think the jewish community at large has gone seriously astray. This is not an isolated kid here and there, this depicts a significant number of kids in the school i work in. how do you teach a teenager humility, morals and especially respect when they are drowning in so much wealth.
He’s right. Most people always talk about those who have money. The poorer and less wealthy person? EH..! He’s just a schnorrer..!! hardly anything is said about a person’s values and or about important things in life in general. I heard it in shul , at wedding , etc. Money , money , money,,, he’s absolutely right. Way to go Rabbi Boteach..!!
one of our dear litvish ‘gedolim’ were at an aguda convention speaking about ‘torah iz di beste schoireh’.. did he really believe what he was saying? how would this faker convince others (we are talking one of the big names here)
read on…
A man in the audience stood up and said…’R’ so and so….I believed everythingyou said when I listened to you while I was in your very prominent yeshiva. I went on to kollel and didnt go into the business world, as you taught us to do. I sat and learned while raising a wonderful family, each of my children a more precious gem than the next. R’…when it came time for you to marry off your son, the shadchan went over to you with two prepositions, my daughter, the daughter of a life long kollel man, or Miss so and so, the daughter of another student of yours who left learning to make his fortune in the business world. you went for the money. the excuse being you wanted your precious son to be able to sit and learn without financial worry.
We’ve built a Jewish private education system that is virtually unaffordable for the middle class. With some yeshiva high school tuitions starting at $23,000/student, we have no choice but to rely on the wealthy for their monetary contributions (although we certainly shouldn’t have to idolize them). One can very well understand the pressure to do well materially in this community and to go into fields that pay well. The reality is that not everyone can be a successful business person…we still need teachers, social workers, therapists, librarians etc.,etc.
Shmuley
Very well said
The point is that is ok to mechaved ashirim that give a great portion of their wealth to Tzedaka
But I see many Rabbis that are sucking to ashirim, that give a liitle,(little proportion according to their wealth) in order to get more ferom them,, like a business
and the truth is that ,unfortunetaley I am talking about 80& or more
I know one guy that always tried to hide his fortune, and he did it very succefull living in a ols rented house,
Last year, he pleased his wife and moved to a wonderfull house , seems thatt he realtor told some ppl that he paid all cash, and now he became like the new Rabbi-target
id like to see the shules give aliyas to the hatzola members, to the chevra kaddisha, to the misaskim members. most shules kiss up to those who give the biggest donations of $$. what about the donations of time and trying to save lives or do things for kiddush Hashem?